Diva's Weekly Principle:

"Attitude is Everything". ~2011 Diva Principle

Monday, July 6, 2009

Do You Qualify

Do you qualify to be the man I need you to be? Will you be able to recognize the things you need to see? Will you be able to understand, that I'm a good woman and in my life I need a good man?

Do you qualify to put me in my place if you see I am slippin? Can you talk to me, wholeheartedly, not constantly holding your feelings??


Do you qualify to be called all mine? Can you leave the other women and temptations behind? Can you come to me with your problems and not wait until it's too late? Can you stand up and admit if you made a mistake?


Do you qualify to be the honest ebony man I would want you to be? Would you be able to look me in my eyes and admit your feelings to me? Could you take me in your arms and make love to me all night long? Can you be sensitive and still be strong?


Do you qualify to be my friend as well as my lover? Can you put our love before any other? Can you cherish me as if I were Diamonds & Gold? Can you make me feel like I'm the last woman you'll ever hold?


Do you qualify to be called a good man? If I have doubts can you reassure me and understand? Can your love intoxicate me as if I were High? To be in my life, I need to know.....


Ladies, I printing this poem out and blastering it on my mirror. I love this poem. There is a response from the man, that I will send at another date. I love this!


Tamara said...

I am feeling very emotional as I read your blog entries this am, Maya started me off then this blew me away...I love it!
It's exactly what I needed to hear...thanks.
You know I read many books and online articles about relationships and they just don't seem to fit the type of woman that I am on an emotional, intellectual, and sexual level. They just seem childish, antiquated, and unbalanced, if you will.
I am a strong minded woman. I know what I want (most of the time, lol),and I don't mind looking you in the eyes and letting you know. I like to hold the reigns but at the same time like to give them back.
I do not feel because I am sexual that makes me cheap. Believe me, I have contemplated my sexual relationships in my head before I have engaged. I don't agree, as most relationship experts and in the words of the great Steve Harvey, that sex is the cookie.
Come on my brother, we are so much more than sexual. Your goal, as a man, may be sex-oriented and hey news flash mine is too. I enjoy sex, crave sex, and by golly would , just like most men, do anything for great sex. When I give myself to you sexually I have already contemplated the sex factor in my head.
If you , as a man, have stopped at the sex factor, you lose out in seeing my true worth. I am not cheap because I have given into a sexual desire. I am human.
I do however behold many more facets and truths if you are willing to "dive a little deeper"; sex is just a superficial layer to the real, unsolicited me.
So yes, great blog...and I ask, my Brutha,..."Do you Qualify?"

philosophy of james said...

Yeah Stella. I do qualify. I qualify to be the strong man your arms desire.

The question is, Stella. How many times?
The question is, Stella. Do you really want the quality of having a good man?

That's the question?

stella said...


Still I Rise, will always give strength to a woman! Especially, one who has survived the struggles of lyfe.

Books, articles, seminars don't and can't define the person. They are simply there as tools and guidance to get us through the process.

You have to know who you are and whose you are to be able to define the woman you are.

I have to disagree with you, Steve Harvey opened up a door of understanding for me. I believe that most men look at sex as the cookie. They will use any excuse to get to the cookie. Even the damn Church Brotha has a mission.

Most single women, like myself, we go for it. We want the sex just as bad as the man does, only problem with that is: The man knows it's just sex and nothing else. We on the other hand are very emotional and once we give up the cookie, we expect his love.

The problem with women is yes, we already got the plot in our head for some wild and crazy sex! But, its not in our hearts. Our heart says, this man will love me and be with me. We just had some great sex and now he will want me. Wrong my sista, he already knew in his heart you are only sexual. And that's what f**ks us up. We didn't accept that in our hearts.

Men have simply plotted in their hearts that it's just sex and they don't need to think in their minds because they are clueless. It doesn't matter to them because it's just sex in their heart. There heart is fixed.

Does it make us cheap? No, not cheap; it just lowers our self worth every time. Every time I sleep with a man, I give a part of me to him that could never be regained. So, I loose my self-worth everytime. Especially, if he doesn't qualify.

We are never cheap but we don't gain our worth either.

I love this poem. Now, I just have to remind myself to make sure "He Qualifies".

Anonymous said...

Having the Quality of a Good Man isn't the question for me.

I think we are all a work in progress.

Im just learning to Qualify first and foremost. Something, that I never knew to do before.

Tamara said...

Well I haven't read Steve's book yet so I shouldn't have spoke outta turn cuz I love many things about the man....but your explanation makes perfect sense...The "Man" believes it is the "cookie"...
I would just like to reiterate to men: If you think that sex is the cookie, lord knows your missing out on the true essence of a woman.
One thing I have to disagree with is that I too can set my mind to use a man for sex only, been there done that! Maybe I shouldn't have, but at the time it wasn't an issue...got what I needed and got out. I don't feel as thouigh I've lost any self-worth because I do know who I am and what I want. I think each of my experiences has made me the woman I have become today.
When I have decided to share myself with a man at this stage in my life, be assured that I am not just in it for sex. I have chosen the man because of many observed qualities, intellectual stimulation,and heartfelt desires to enjoy every essence of his being. I truly want a body, heart, mind, and soul experience. I guess I just find it difficult to wrap-around that men even after a "courtship", so to say, still can disguise their feelings. They are hypoallergenic to the "C" word...they live in fear I suppose, or at least some type of resistant barrier.
If we, as woman, are respected for our true inner self, we will delight in giving you ALL you need to become the king you were meant to be with a beautiful, strong queen by your side.

Stella, it appears someone is looking to help you with your groove. lol :)